I know a lot of people think Valentine's Day is a commercial holiday made up to sell more cards, flowers, and candy, but I totally, completely, and unreservedly love Valentine's Day. I love that one day a year that we can be totally cheesy, sentimental, and in love because I'm a die-hard romantic and not shy about admitting it to the world. I also don’t believe in buying something for Valentine’s Day unless it’s something you’re into, probably because my dad had three rules for Valentine’s Day gifts for my mom: They had to be cheap, public, and embarrassing.
The first time my dad went all out for Valentine's Day, he had just graduated college, I was a baby, and my parents were broke. There was no way he could afford to provide my mom with any traditional Valentine's Day gifts or experiences, considering they were still using milk crates as furniture. No, there won't be fancy jewelry (my hippie mom wouldn't have liked it anyway) or fancy dinners with Joanne. Instead, he made hearts out of wood, painted them red, wrote love letters to my mom on them, and stuck them in the snowdrift out front. The next year, he built a heart-shaped rink in our backyard, dyed it red with non-toxic paint, and a few years later, when he and a high school friend of mine snuck up to the hill next to the school, he actually This move was imitated. He painted a billboard-sized heart on the highway to show the whole town how much he loved my mom. Then one time, he asked my brother and I to help him finger-paint hearts and messages on the walls of our house, only to realize – oops! – is not actually washed away.
So, yes, Valentine's Day was always exciting and fun when I was growing up - and I never saw a cheesy card. Instead, the day is all about getting creative with the resources available to you, whether it’s scrap wood, snowdrifts or your kids’ finger paints. I carry this joy with me into my adult life every year when Valentine's Day comes around, whether I'm partnered or single, I celebrate it with all my heart, and I want to help everyone give up on the commercialism of Valentine's Day too!
With that in mind, here are 10 ways to celebrate Valentine's Day that may not be cheap, public, or embarrassing, but will definitely not make Hallmark any richer. Some are moves straight out of my dad's playbook, some are from my current partner, and some I've come up with on my own - but they're definitely more exciting than a box of chocolates.
1. Create a Crafted Scavenger Hunt
If your partner loves mysteries or games, a scavenger hunt is a great way to show them you care. Find serious romantic effect by focusing on something specific in your relationship, like where you hold important occasions. Or, put it in your bedroom that you dress up like it's Valentine's Day with tacky AF roses and red sheets.
2. Make a memory card
Our first Valentine's Day together, my boyfriend gave me little note cards throughout the day with hand-drawn specific memories of our time together. Each person received a small gift, which although not extravagant, was very thoughtful. The final card of the day was not about memories but about hope for the future, which basically made my heart melt in my chest. He also took a card from my dad's playbook and put the message you see on it on the projector in our coworking space, much to my embarrassment.
3. Attach the sandwich panel to their car
This is one of my favorites from my dad’s Valentine’s Day archives. He drew a sandwich board sign (like the kind you see outside coffee shops trying to get you in) with a heart and "Stu Loves Joan" written on either side, and then connected it to her car roof. This particular embarrassment lasted a week because he refused to take it off and my mom was too young to take it off herself.
4. Cook a hearty meal at home
If you don't want to deal with crowds or you can't justify spending hundreds of dollars on a restaurant meal this year, make a ballerina dinner at home. What’s the best part about making it yourself? You can combine all of your partner's favorite foods into one crazy, hearty meal because you're not limited by a menu. Fried chicken with pad thai? Yes, please!
5. Use whipped cream to draw a heart on your house
Another one from Dad's files. He decided to "paint" a giant heart in buttercream on the front of our house with his and my mom's initials on it. He wanted to make it with whipped cream but couldn't afford it, so he bought the cheapest shaving cream in the store. You can imagine his surprise when he washed it off and discovered that the shaving cream had cleaned the century-old bricks in front of our house, leaving years of shadows. The "giant heart in front of the house" theme has been repeated several times over the years, including in 2010, when he created the "Key to My Heart" Valentine above.
6. Plan a theme day
Last Valentine's Day, my boyfriend took me to some random places around Guatemala on a rented motorcycle, where we were living at the time. He told me from the beginning that the day had a theme, and with each subsequent gift or location, he had me guess what it was. It took me a while, but by around noon, I knew it was "different is good" and he chose this theme because we are very different people and he knew it would stress me out sometimes.
7. Leave handmade love notes around the house
This one is cheap and is sure to put a smile on your partner's face. Writing little love notes in unexpected places is a great way to express your feelings without breaking the bank. They're also great for days outside of Valentine's Day when you just want to show you care.
8. Commit to telling your partner 100 reasons why you love them
Spend some time brainstorming all the reasons, big and small, that make you love your partner. Then, on Valentine's Day, tell them at a random time during the day. You can send your love via text message, call them on the phone, tell them in person... what matters is that they feel noticed and showered with love. (Oh, and apparently it's completely free!)
9. Send them sexting messages throughout the day
There’s nothing like an unexpected sex message to get your partner excited for Valentine’s Day sex! Send them dirty messages and pictures throughout the day to excite them and remind them of you. However, before you start this, obviously make sure they enjoy sexting, otherwise you might end up with a very angry partner.
10. Hiking – Bring a bottle of sparkling wine
If you enjoy the outdoors, choose a sunrise hike at a time when the sun is just emerging when you reach the top. Cheers to a new day and your love from the top of the mountain. This will definitely make you swoon.
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Photo credit: VTT Studio/Fotolia; Jiffy (7); Emma McGowan (3); Fotolia
