If you consistently feel upset and misunderstood, and thus have difficulty at work and in relationships, this may be a sign that you have a learning disability as an adult. While this problem may have been present since you were a child, struggling with it in adult life may make you realize something is wrong. So, what could it be?
"Some common learning disabilities in adulthood include dyslexia, ADHD, dyscalculia, dysgraphia, and processing deficits," Shirley Chandler, Ph.D., a licensed mental health counselor and provost at Beacon College in Florida, tells Bustle. "All [these] learning disabilities can impact home and work life." If you suspect one of these problems has been bothering you, Chandler recommends contacting a psychologist familiar with learning disabilities. He or she can pinpoint the disability and then teach you coping mechanisms.
Depending on your disability, you may be taught how to better structure your life through lists, reminders, and daily plans. You might get a coach. And, you might even be given medication to help you cope better with anxiety, which Chandler told me is common among people with learning disabilities. Read on for some signs that this might be the best route for you.
1. You often feel a little lost
It can be very frustrating when your achievements don't match what you think you're capable of doing. "Many people with learning disabilities have great talents, but these talents are often never utilized because they give up and feel lost," Chandler said.
2. It’s hard for you to keep a job
If you're struggling with an underlying learning disability, it can make simple things — like getting through a day's work — extra difficult. "At work, undiagnosed adults may be viewed as employees who can't get things done," Chandler said. "They may have experienced job termination and been told that they looked smart, but they just had a hard time getting things done."
3. Sometimes you have difficulty communicating with people
Yes, you are a very lovely person with good intentions. However, because of your disability, others cannot see it. "[Your] disability may cause [you] to forget, argue, procrastinate, get angry, and not follow through," Chandler says. And, even if it's not your fault, others may not find these traits very flattering.
4. You have a short attention span
One of the biggest symptoms of a learning disability is short attention span, which is often a symptom of ADHD. It may affect your work and you may encounter the problems I mentioned above. But a lack of focus can also make you appear a bit depressed, which can damage your relationships.
5. Many of your relationships are chaotic
Whether it's with friends, family, or a significant other, you seem to have a pattern of failing to maintain healthy relationships. This is a very common problem for people with learning disabilities. As Chandler says, "If the disability is not diagnosed and understood, family members can become convinced that the disabled person is choosing his or her behavior. Failed marriages are a common result."
6. You are angry but don’t know why
When dealing with a frustrating problem like a learning disability, you may feel annoyed and impatient throughout the day. Among other things, this may lead to you lashing out in anger. "Anger can be part of the behavior of adults with learning disabilities," Chandler said. "They may experience less inhibition than others and may become angry more quickly."
7. You’ve been struggling with low self-esteem, anxiety, or depression
Or hey, maybe you already have all three. "Often, adults with learning disabilities...have secondary psychological problems such as poor self-esteem, anxiety and/or depression," Chandler said. This may be partly due to the embarrassment and frustration you feel over failed relationships and jobs, as well as feeling like you're not living up to your potential.
8. You have started using drugs or alcohol
If you are turning to drugs as a coping mechanism, be aware. "People with learning disabilities are often blamed for chaos at home and scapegoated at work and at home," says Chandler. "Year after year, the negative emotions they experience lower their self-esteem. The cycle they are caught in can lead to people using alcohol or drugs to relieve stress."
9. You’ve never been good at reading or math
With a learning disability such as dyslexia (which affects reading and writing) or dyscalculia (which affects math abilities), you may think you're stupid. but it is not the truth. "It's important to realize that learning disabilities have nothing to do with intelligence," clinical psychologist Mayra Mendez, Ph.D., tells Bustle. "A person who is struggling with a learning difference may score very high on an IQ test but still have difficulty processing number sequences, spelling accurately, and understanding reading passages."
10. You have trouble finding your way
Are you always lost? Do you have trouble distinguishing left from right? As clinical psychologist and radio host Dr. Joshua Klapow says, "Even if you're sure you understand the directions or instructions, you can get the wrong instructions." This can be a sign of a disability, such as ADHD.
11. You get overwhelmed easily
You often feel overwhelmed because things don't come easy to you (such as being able to stay focused). As Crapo told me, this is especially noticeable in noisy, busy, or distracting situations. You may also feel overwhelmed when given instructions that sound "too long," causing you to stagnate and forget.
Sound familiar? Then it could mean that you have a learning disability as an adult. If you think this may be the case, be sure to contact a psychologist. They can tell you what's going on and help you learn some better ways to cope.
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